Career Day
This week has been a dull and tedious one. It was basically the adroit repetitiveness one would expect from a normal week of, well, nothing. I can't say that I hated this week, because I did not, nor can I say anything unusually quirky happened, because it did not- with the exception of maybe Friday. I did, however, read and finish the book Running with Scissors (it's a great, funny book and I would advise you kiddies to read it). For some reason, this book got me thinking (don't ask why) about my life once I'm done with high school. I know, I'm only 15-16, and I still have long time ahead of me, but I just wondered what should I do with my life? At the moment, I have pretty much no idea of what to do once I graduate from college, and inevitably make it with a career- not a job- to become successful.
It all seemed simple when I was younger. Some one would ask me, "What do you want to do when you grow up, Josh?" I would then promptly answer at age 6, "A dinosaur digger!" at age 8, "An astronaut!" at age 13, "I want to be a forensic pathologist!" (such a contrast from dinosaur digger and astronaut). Well, now that my dinosaur, astronaut, and somewhat morbid fascination phase is over, I am left pondering what to continue in life so that I can be not only happy, but fulfilled with my success.
Now, the elusive "success". When one thinks of this platonic idea, they envision golden mansions, perpetual money, designer clothes, and half naked Italian pool boys. Yet, as I have grown older, and the delusions of grandeur that every kid has-- ask any kid what they want to be when they grow up, they will answer, "rich," or "driving a stretch limo" -- have disintegrated away, "success" has become something entirely different. Of course, I would love to have Oprah kiss my ass for money, but I now know this is entirely impossible. Success has evolved into an aspiration less of money and "big pimpin'" to a dream of sound content with my life and my life's path. Yet, at this point in my life, I do not know what or even where my life and life's path will be. I had no idea of what to do. I honestly have no passion for a subject which I could in turn, turn into a career of which I love. Obviously, I am not a passionate person.
In school they give you those stupid What should you do? type surveys. I usually stare at the blank piece of paper until I decide to lie. When it asks, "Describe yourself," I usually put something along the lines of I'm creative, intelligent, I like to read, I like to travel, ... did I say creative? I don't really think any of those really accurately describe me. It is my belief that one cannot accurately describe themselves. You know what I mean? Like, when you're about to leave the house to do something, and you see yourself in the mirror when you get that one "hot angle," you think to yourself Holy Crap! You, sir, are a hottie! I would do you, rawr! Then, after you leave the house, you see yourself in a shiny window or something and are shocked at how different you look. That's how I feel when describing my interests. Sure, I like to read and write; but I can't seem to grasp or understand how I can turn this into a viable career. I don't earnestly think I'm particularly good at these things (I think it's my over-zealous use of punctuation) or that I am any better than the other large number of people who enjoy English.
Hence, this is why I can't seem to decide on any career that would not only interests me but to also fulfill me. All I know at this point is that I want to get out of this stupid town and do something bigger, greater, and more me. Who knows, maybe one day I'll find my Barbie Dream House and, what the hell, maybe a Ken to go in my Malibu convertible.
It all seemed simple when I was younger. Some one would ask me, "What do you want to do when you grow up, Josh?" I would then promptly answer at age 6, "A dinosaur digger!" at age 8, "An astronaut!" at age 13, "I want to be a forensic pathologist!" (such a contrast from dinosaur digger and astronaut). Well, now that my dinosaur, astronaut, and somewhat morbid fascination phase is over, I am left pondering what to continue in life so that I can be not only happy, but fulfilled with my success.
Now, the elusive "success". When one thinks of this platonic idea, they envision golden mansions, perpetual money, designer clothes, and half naked Italian pool boys. Yet, as I have grown older, and the delusions of grandeur that every kid has-- ask any kid what they want to be when they grow up, they will answer, "rich," or "driving a stretch limo" -- have disintegrated away, "success" has become something entirely different. Of course, I would love to have Oprah kiss my ass for money, but I now know this is entirely impossible. Success has evolved into an aspiration less of money and "big pimpin'" to a dream of sound content with my life and my life's path. Yet, at this point in my life, I do not know what or even where my life and life's path will be. I had no idea of what to do. I honestly have no passion for a subject which I could in turn, turn into a career of which I love. Obviously, I am not a passionate person.
In school they give you those stupid What should you do? type surveys. I usually stare at the blank piece of paper until I decide to lie. When it asks, "Describe yourself," I usually put something along the lines of I'm creative, intelligent, I like to read, I like to travel, ... did I say creative? I don't really think any of those really accurately describe me. It is my belief that one cannot accurately describe themselves. You know what I mean? Like, when you're about to leave the house to do something, and you see yourself in the mirror when you get that one "hot angle," you think to yourself Holy Crap! You, sir, are a hottie! I would do you, rawr! Then, after you leave the house, you see yourself in a shiny window or something and are shocked at how different you look. That's how I feel when describing my interests. Sure, I like to read and write; but I can't seem to grasp or understand how I can turn this into a viable career. I don't earnestly think I'm particularly good at these things (I think it's my over-zealous use of punctuation) or that I am any better than the other large number of people who enjoy English.
Hence, this is why I can't seem to decide on any career that would not only interests me but to also fulfill me. All I know at this point is that I want to get out of this stupid town and do something bigger, greater, and more me. Who knows, maybe one day I'll find my Barbie Dream House and, what the hell, maybe a Ken to go in my Malibu convertible.
posted by Josh at 9:36 PM
2 Comments:
theres only one way to describe and that is a strange strange little boy...otherwise I am sure you'll figure it out because it always seems like you do...but in my opinion you should become prestident...but hey its whatever floats your boat...i only hope in your futer your not driven by greed or revenge but by passion
i think you are DEFINATELY creative. i seem to recall a certain drag queen dinosaur that agrees. i dont think i know anyone else that would think of something like that.
and i think you write good. you sound intelligent when you write.........too bad you dont ALWAYS sound intelligent...haha i'm kidding.
and pretty much, i agree with, or at least can relate to, pretty much everything you said in that...
especially the fourth paragraph.
oh, and you still need to lend me Running with Scissors.....
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